Pre Knee Surgery Musings

These were my thoughts last week. See tomorrow’s blog for how it’s going this week.

A little over 3 weeks before my birthday I injured my knee. I’m not sure how I did it; I think I just twisted it wrong. One of my friends suggested I come up with a much better story, like I injured it while figure skating or something. Anyone who knows me knows that isn’t possible – I have about as much coordination as a piece of wet spaghetti.

This particular birthday ends in an 0. I have grandchildren so it is not 40 or 50 and let’s just leave it at that. I was feeling pretty bummed because I love celebrating my birthday, it’s one of my favorite parts of the year. I’m blessed to have many friends and much love in my life so I look forward to cake, cards, flowers, gifts and posts on Facebook. But this year I was hobbling around on a cane having more and more pain everyday just waiting for the date for my knee surgery.

The fact that mine was no ordinary cane took some of the sting out. I dusted off the one I purchased years ago for my bad knee, wrapped it in pink sparkly duct tape, and the gals at work finished bedazzling it for me with a zillion rhinestones. At one family gathering my granddaughters even autographed the bottom part like they would a cast. This thing gets attention. And it also gets me around.

Actually, it’s the only way I can get around lately and even that is difficult. Stairs are the worst. I hate not being able to wear my heels and I hate not being able to go down the backyard deck stairs to add water to the bird bath and bird seed to the feeder. I hate the fact that it takes me forever to water the plants or unload the dishwasher or do a load of laundry. I know I’m supposed to be glad that I can move around at all especially knowing that time is coming to an end when I have the surgery. One thing I don’t hate is the pain medicine because it really helps but I hate the side effects. And I don’t like not being able to exercise and I don’t like the extra pounds that is putting on me and I just don’t like laying around or sitting around at all when pain is involved.

Things I usually enjoy like reading or watching a good movie or stitching have lost some of their joy because I can’t get comfortable. Every now and then I’ll remind myself of how lucky I am that it could be so much worse. I know people suffering from real grief or a devastating illness and that’s not me. This problem can be fixed. Maybe what I really don’t like is not being in control. Maybe that’s the lesson God wants me to learn in all of this. I can’t control what I am able to do, my injury does that. And God allowed the injury. Maybe it’s time to be reminded of Who is in charge after all. Something to ponder while I wait for surgery.