Betrayal

Three weeks ago on my walk I found 3 silver dimes – one early on in the walk and two more a little later. I had also found a dime on my walk the day before, and was quite curious about it. Usually any change I find on the ground is pennies.

Almost immediately upon bending down to pick up the two dimes I had the thought that there was significance to finding the 3 dimes on the same walk. I began to pray about it, asking the Lord to reveal what He was trying to tell me if anything, or to put my mind at ease if this was just a fun .30 cents to put in my change jar. As I walked my Silver Hills route (I name all of my neighborhood walks) I thought about the dimes. What was the significance? Was it in the fact that each was worth .10 cents, or the total of .30 cents, or the fact they were round or silver? Then it hit me. Just like the silent but strong God nudges always do. I knew what finding the dimes meant. It had to do with ‘30’ and ‘pieces of silver’. It was the day before Easter.

In the Bible that phrase has enormous significance. It was the price of betrayal that Judas received for handing Jesus over to the authorities who were going to kill him. In Hebrew culture just as in our day, 30 pieces of silver was not a lot of money. Back then it was the price paid to a master for a slave’s accidental death. The price for a man’s life. The Jewish leaders gave Judas what they considered Jesus to be worth – 30 pieces of silver.

So, if I found ’30 pieces of silver’ on my walk and I knew it was supposed to mean something, what did it mean? It had to mean some kind of betrayal. I sensed that someone was going to betray me. But when, and how? Unsettled by the thought, I finished my walk and placed the 3 dimes on the kitchen table when I got home. I had already prayed that God would give me wisdom about it and prepare me going forward.

The very next week I had my answer. Unexpectedly I came upon some letters. As I read through them I found something that was indeed a betrayal. A betrayal of trust, of assistance I had given, and of things I had been told which I now knew were lies. A kick to the stomach, a punch in the gut. Worst feeling ever.

I was grateful to God for preparing me, making it easier to take and helping me know how to address it. For betrayal must be addressed, if it is proper and safe to do so. And because my God is able, all- knowing, I can act in full confidence, knowing that the same God who prepared me will see me through this. The one who betrayed me meant to insult me, to discredit and ‘throw me under the bus’ if at all possible. So far I’m still on the bus, but only time can heal the damaged feelings and the disappointment of trust broken and a relationship derailed.

But isn’t God amazing? My 30 pieces of silver was exactly the image I needed to gear my mind for betrayal, for injustice, for words I didn’t deserve. And as I reflect on this Easter season, when we celebrate Jesus’ miraculous resurrection from the grave after being betrayed by one of His closest associates, I know that what I am dealing with is minuscule in comparison. For a God who can raise from the dead and provide forgiveness from sin, my little situation is nothing. And yet He cares enough about me to warn me, to prepare me for whatever fallout is coming so that I can handle it with grace and perspective. All because He handed me three silver dimes.